Have you ever dwelled on unresolved conflicts for months, if not years, where all you can think about are the negative side of things?
Are you the kind of person who always sees a glass half empty instead of a glass half full?
Do you have a tendency to be overprotective, over-cautious, overstressed by little minutiae because you somehow find a way to interpret them as bad dangerous things?
If you are naturally inclined to be pessimistic about life, the chances are that you aren’t happy most of the time. As sarcastic as it sounds, you are very good at finding reasons (or excuses) to be upset about everything that happens to you and this is negatively affecting your entire well-being.
Luckily, things don’t have to be this way. You have a choice. You have latent personal power to change that.
While some people are hardwired to find the negatives in almost everything, others are the exact opposite who are able to find the goods in everything.
If you tend to dwell on the negative, here’s the big thing you can do now in order to change your perspective for the better.
It’s called choosing happiness.
It sounds pretty simple although it’s a difficult transformational process for some fellows.
The first thing you need to do is to remember what happens to you is not always within your control, but how you react to it is.
Once you realize this, you are immediately more powerful because you are now choosing how circumstances can affect you. You now understand that no one can make you sad, angry or depressed because your happiness does not depend on anyone or anything.
Your happiness depends on you.
This attitude can be a challenge for some, especially those who have years of ingrained habits, thinking patterns, and belief systems that shaped their worldview into a negativity-biased reality.
However, the idea of reframing is to push out the negative thoughts and try to see things with a different perspective.
For example, if your significant other recently left you, the negative reaction for most is to dwell on what you did wrong and to feel sorry for yourself. To reframe this thought, you must consider the other people you have in your life who still love you.
It is okay to note the mistakes you may have made in the past relationships, but recognize that most of us made mistakes as well. And what’s more important right now is to stop living in fear, stop arguing over unimportant issues, stop figuring who’s right and who’s wrong, but start loving opening and generously while you still can.
Also, you must define what optimism means to you personally. Even the same words can sometime mean different things to different people.
Generally, optimistic people tend to believe that everything happens for a reason, but no matter what happens, everything will work out how it is supposed to and we will be fine.
While bad things are inevitably going to happen, it is important to learn from them and move on rather than dwell on them, letting the past things sucking your energy, time and spirit away.
If you’re willing to stop and take some time to reframe situations in a new, fresh and positive way, you will be a conscious human being who can design a happier, more successful, more fulfilling life.